The teacher thought she was going to win this game but underestimated my teamwork with my classmates. I go to the place we agreed to meet and I saw no women there. Have you experienced tender, swollen bumps, either on or under your skin, that may produce foul-smelling liquid and scarring? 9. And laughed. Jellyfish fiasco: So when I was like 9 I went to this aquarium thing and it was a pretty amusing trip overall. The whole school thought I was going to star on Drake and Josh: In second grade, I told everyone that I was leaving school before next semester to move to Hollywood to play Megan’s cousin from Vermont on Drake and Josh. Learn about us. Free Funny Short Stories The internet is a great resource for literature - you don't even need to go to the library! And in the middle of all the kids, sat a smug looking MOIRA with my PRINGLES. So, naturally, I also put my finger on my nose. So I have this mini freak out at my friend Seth sitting next to me. It was Christmas Eve 1881. on our other post. Now when we stand up for the pledge, he moves all the way to the back of the room away from me…. But the wrestlers grab the uniforms and rush out of the room to go change in the bathroom, and come back to show them off. Dedicated to your stories and ideas. my pockets were so small that they made me look like I had two rumors on each of my hips. So I open my camera, take a picture- and guess what? It is all I can do in my power to keep from laughing from sheer shock. the biggest and most hilarious thing I ever dumped was a gallon of milk. Big surprise it wasn’t. She didn’t know until we went to breakfast with some friends and took me to the bathroom. Draped in a cape, his hair divided with aluminium clips, Frank, an ex-paratrooper corporal raced out to the car and found the driver unhurt. : When I was a kid, I was always excited to learn new vocabulary. We get in the car and I thought I was doing pretty well, until she starts freaking out? We were coming up over a mountain road with a really beautiful ocean view just at sunset. I call the teacher, she tries to find them but she can’t either. After a good 30 seconds of intense farting, he looked at his mom and said, “I feel all better now!”, 11. I was a crying, bawling mess of a child, to the point I was doing that weird cry, stutter, hiccup noise. The entire class was also going ballistic trying to see who would win. Absolutely funny already. Realizing what she just said, she turned red and in a more quiet voice goes, “please don’t tell your parents.”, 27. Going to bed angry is never good policy…. 34 "I Laughed So Hard I Cried" Stories. 24. I’m incredibly bad with directions and easily distracted, so I lost sight of the rest of the group and went completely the wrong way. 1. I, scared shitless, am peeking around the corner watching it all go down. I took pity on her and told her what was really happening. 51. turns out she was the lady that had to do the actual road test with me. Then suddenly, I sneezed really loudly, the teachers turned around and saw me standing there. So skip forward again and my teacher sees me with the book again and says, “How many of those do you have?” I gave my smartass remark as “enough.” She took away that book, too. 36. ... We at Bright Side love this humor and we’ve compiled the most interesting stories we could find. He rented a Redbox movie and made a pizza. When I showed up on the first day of school in third grade, I told everyone that the show was going off the air after the season finished (even though I had no knowledge of when it was ending), and so they wouldn’t need me. Then a couple of hours later, during lunch I was walking past the staffroom to get to the lunch hall when I heard my speech being played, being curious I stopped and I heard them replay “I am gay myself actually” a couple of times over. crisisification / Imgur. Classroom Chaos: So in 8th grade I used to read during class a lot. Even without what I mention next, the suits look funny. These would then be recorded to put on the school website. It was just a game of “How many books does this one 8th grader have?”, So at the end of the class she thought she had taken 11 books from me. I rush over to see what it is. These funny short stories are really cracking my ribs? Nothing easier than spending someone else’s money! gives me a field sobriety test. Things like drinking water or doing squats. 35. 5th grade teacher: In fifth grade, my teacher loathed me. ... Or this story, which might be the most embarrassing story in the entire world: Sarah Lyons @sarbeaaaar. We had no rice or anything to save my phone so we tried laying it out to dry, not even 15 minutes later it starts down pouring destroying my phone even more. But the teacher didn’t know I was out. They all smelled strange so we started to think about names we could give them ‘grandma’s toilet cleaning agent’ or sth like this. In dreams: I’ve always had super vivid dreams and it takes me a while after waking up to realize that they’re not real. I had finally gotten the hang of it and I was riding around the circle showing off, and my mom was like “say cheese” so I look over at her for a second and I FUCKING RAM INTO A CAR AT FULL SPEED. This resulted in a lot of wrestlers skipping class and barging into our classroom to hang out and not get in trouble. 55. He looked me dead in the eye and said, “This is the worst part.” I then watched this boy open the oven and pull the pizza out with his bare hands, rack and all, screaming at the top of his lungs. Beatrice January 25, 2017, 1:23 pm. 56. On this particular day, we were doing the Pledge of Allegiance and I had put my left hand to my chest (it’s supposed to be your right hand over your heart). But one day, he walked in looking like a freaking GQ model, and I accidentally out loud whispered “Shit, his face looks like the best chair” and the girl who sits in front of me turned around and said “WTH, that’s freaky and gross” and she moved her seat. Nov 19, 2020 - Funny Short Stories and the Best Joke Stories in 2020 | Funny stories, Funny jokes | More on www.TheFunnyBeaver.com | All sorts of Funny Stuff :) #lol #funnyshortstories #funnyjokes #funnymemes #adultstories #funnystories. how do you transfer money?” and he did it to show me how… and then he asked for my character to teabag his and moan into the mic, and I was like a 15 year old boy, so instead… I just blocked him and took the money. I had some paper in my arms from last class so I decided to use those and figure out everything during lunch instead of making a scene at like literally the first week of my high school career. Then, she walked me back to the classroom, and made our whole class redo the Pledge with our ‘right’ hand, with me leading the class, and it was one of the happiest moments of my elementary experience. The whole time she saw me as the quiet teacher’s pet who was shy as hell. I was weirdly excited since I hadn’t gotten one with my name on it yet. We were watching the movie and the oven beeped so the pizza was done. I waited for almost two hours, refusing to take a shower even though the mud was starting to dry up. That’s not even the sad part, the sad part is my friends phone died so I just sat there with mud all over me at the dining room table staring at my blank phone just waiting. Don’t ask me why, I was just filled with child-like glee I guess. He is still my favorite teacher I’ve ever had. “…What did you say?”, Of course I started crying harder and I said “NO it’s just a test you’re going to wash my mouth out with soap again.”. The Scotsman asks for a year's supply of whisky; it's given to him and he's locked away. One day, seven wrestlers come in yelling about new wrestling uniforms, and how excited they were. Lesson learned. Panic! Duh?? AND THE SHOW ENDED AFTER THAT SEASON AND EVERYONE BELIEVED ME UP UNTIL LIKE 6TH GRADE BUT NOW MY BEST FRIEND WILL NEVER LET ME FORGET ABOUT IT AND I’M SO ANGRY. These funny stories will have you laughing for days. After about a minute or two, I realized something was wrong. 6 Outrageous Family Stories That Are Guaranteed to Make You Laugh Out Loud Reader's Digest Canada Updated: May 15, 2019 From Valentine's Day faux pas to home repairs gone awry, you won't believe these Canadians' hilarious family stories. The whole class was hysterically laughing, my teacher was extremely confused, and I almost cried as I scrolled past all the kissing tutorials and finally found the movie. When I was in first grade, my teacher taught me that “shin” was another word for leg. A Catholic school. Ed policy. When it was almost time to get my chicken nuggets, I walked into a cinnamon scented kitchen. “what if you accidentally stole someone’s backpack? 42. Big Frank. 20. There was a boy that I had a crush on for the past year in my class. So, his mom took him to the doctor’s office, where the doctor took one look and told her to take him to the ER. I had never been to Chicago before, so naturally I had to go see the big city. Ethan is laughing his ass off, Nate (next oldest brother) is rolling on the floor, and I’m just sitting there like WTF. Now let me say in my defense the neighborhood I lived in was in south Dallas and it’s still not a safe place. So I shook my boyfriend fully awake and told him I heard the doorbell and to go check it because I was scared. A terrible burning smell had filled my kitchen. Imagine if I had opened it inside of the theatre…, 34. 14 Hilarious Stories About Really Awkward Situations. By. 15+. Which isn’t awful, but then I sound it out in my head. one day I was bored and was looking around in the fridge low and behold there it was, a new gallon of milk. 17. In this section I am going to list a few short stories that are accessible online for a good bite-sized read. I opened to a random spot and just pretended like I was reading. My favorite teacher: One time in 6th grade we were at recess and while I was running to my friends, I just so happened to kick a HUGE rock (keep in mind, I was wearing flip-flops so it hurt like hell) and without thinking, I shouted at the top of my lungs “MOTHERFUCKER!” And with my god-awful luck, my math teacher was sitting at the bench right BESIDE ME. In a hilarious series of events, the nose actually moves above Kovalyov in official ranks and is now his senior in the government. In the end it went really well. Not wanting to waste the ramen, I went to the sink and added water, which filled the room in acrid smoke for several seconds. This was two years ago and to this day every time my sister sees the pothole she starts dying from laughter. I forgot that they mail home the end-of-year cards, and my mom got it before I could intercept with my fake. All glowed up: After the final bell, my friend and I were walking to our buses after school through a crowded hallway. Submit your writing to be published on Thought Catalog. 6. We ended up continuing with that scenario and took notes on the scientific method using the very problem that I had created. A Cute Christmas Story. We don’t have a fucking doorbell: So a couple years I moved out of state with a boyfriend. Complete mortification. She still won’t let me live it down! Wrong number. I literally “fell” for him: Since my crush sits behind me in class, when we stood up to do the pledge I stood up too fast and I stumbled over to him so to not fall on the ground I reached to grab his desk but I accidentally GRABBED HIM and I ended up falling on top of him and we both screamed. All the fish: I went to this girl’s party the week after she beat the shit out of my friend. She feared something along the lines of an intestinal rupture. One night, I had a really vivid dream where my friend and I had this huge falling out over something that I can’t even remember now. Now it’s an inside joke between us about not sitting on cold ground. Reading short stories is such a move to sharpen our thinking skills. Little thief: When I was around four or five I was with my mom at this store buying some Christmas gifts. I removed the various packets from the bowl, added the flavor and vegetables, then put the bowl in the microwave. 15. After church they were like “do you wanna learn how to ride them?” And I was like??? Very funny site, thanks a lot and by the way im from Philippines and im reading this funny site, thanks a lot.!! Lotion boy: One time in my chemistry class, while the teacher was talking, this guy asked loudly, “Does anyone have any lotion?” The teacher stopped talking as some girl gave him some hand lotion. so he calls my math teacher yada yada I get my backpack. 53. Sign up for the Thought Catalog Weekly and get the best stories from the week to your inbox every Friday. 2. All rights reserved. And if I didn’t want it, I could sell it for money. Reply. © english-for-students.com. I decided to do one about gay rights as it was not yet legalized in my state. Obviously I left the room immediately. There are innumerable people around the world who spend certain part of every day for reading the funny stories. 7. After a couple of minutes of searching, I couldn’t find the movie since I didn’t know the exact title, so I logged into my YouTube account and decided to find it in my history. My mom’s thong: One day when I was 3 I decided I wanted to be like my mom and wear “big girl” panties. 48. Eric leaves the room, goes upstairs, comes back 3 or 4 minutes later without pants in my underwear, and not just any underwear; Victoria’s Secret, MY VICTORIA’S SECRET (only girl in the family). Bare in mind I’m sat next to my grandparents in the middle of a crowded lobby. These stories are so entertaining. He passed the books slowly around the room, one at a time, until they were back to me. 52. I get all the way to my science class and set the book bag at my desk when LO AND BEHOLD it’s not my backpack. 26. There was some smoke coming from the bowl. Which, is also hysterical because Spandex hides NOTHING; you could see all of their junk. The best short stories can feel like a punch in the gut. I miss that game everyday…. I’ll spare you the details but let’s just say it was not totally normal colored…trying to stay professional I then had to proceed and hold the clients butt cheek taunt to shave it. 24 Hilarious Tweets That Are Actually True Stories. See more ideas about funny stories, funny jokes, joke stories. On the back, it says OC MEN. It's important to talk to a dermatologist about any medical concerns you may have. If I wasn’t a complete fail then I’d be able to get my own bag properly. He was new there but the book was a book I read and LOVED. Future Engineers. Before I continue, I should specify two things. We thought the upholstery in the car seat had ripped. So naturally I approach this boy hoping to make a new friend and bond over the series. save. Find the hottest hilarious stories you'll love. She gives me weird looks every time she sees me now. So eventually my friend explained to me (it literally took 2 hours of convincing) and then ofc I was pretty embarrassed but the thing is the fucking teacher then asked me if she could tell this to the other teachers and that’s the story of how I switched schools. So, I was just jamming, being super confused on this one problem and I look up from my paper to ask my friend how to do it and EVERYONE is intensely looking back and forth between me and another girl with their fingers on their noses. Subscribe and Help Me Hit 3,500,000 little cuties! I then returned the bowl to the microwave and cooked it for two more minutes before attempting to eat it. When we get there, there is a state trooper waiting for me. Just like any other girl, I wanted to get all dolled up before walking around in front of people. I was really good at holding grudges because I was not a forgiving child, so for three weeks I completely ignored my best friend in anger to the point where she started crying in front of the teacher and he asked what was going on. Somehow in some form, I had accidentally baked snickerdoodles. The principal and I were quite aquatinted at this point and so I told her why I was sent back to her office again, and she laughed. 32 Fast Food Workers Reveal The Weirdest, Most Bizarre Stories They’ve Experienced While Working Drive-Thru, 20 Terrifying True Stories About What Happens When You Mess With A Ouija Board, My Gig As A Pizza Delivery Guy Was Strange Enough, But This Order To 6834 Miller Ave. Will Haunt Me Forever, 23 Men And Women Share Their Most Inspirational Love Story (That Really Happened), 25+ Inspirational Stories That Will Make You Smile, 20+ Terrifying And True Ouija Board Stories. My dad chooses the best time to come in with guests, when one of his 10 year old sons is standing in the living room wearing his only daughters frilly Victoria’s Secrets, his oldest isn’t wearing pants, and the other two sons are on the floor dying. And that’s the story of how my entire block found out that the abandoned house had new owners. after yelling at me, she demands I go back to the DMV. 13. Goes all the way to the front door and opens it. The ramen incident: I have decided to remain anonymous to protect my identity from the foolishness. The Irishman asks for a year's supply of Guinness so he's locked up with several thousand bottles of it. Funny Story About Toddlers ~ The Cup of Tea. Well, flash forward to Memorial Day weekend. 10. He was always in trouble and it seemed like every time his dad had to call him it went like this…. The only person talking was the teacher and she was interrupted by freaking cannon fire farts. None of us were sure if it was the fire alarm or the lockdown alarm, so we all head out into the hall to check and no one’s out there, so we head back in and climb under our desks as is lockdown procedure. Funny short story about a woman who visits the gynecologist, but unwittingly made preparations that she didn't intend. one day I was bored and was looking around in the fridge low and behold there it was, a new gallon of milk. Luckily I didn’t hurt or crush him. 49. When we got back from kayaking I took my phone out only to find the bag was submerged in water. 3. What is the funniest story you have ever read on Reddit? Coca-Cola disaster: A couple years ago my friends and I were going to see a movie in the theatre at the mall. 90% Upvoted. So after I read my part, I took out my second copy of Artemis and picked up right where I left off. As it turns out, I am gay. best. She has me pull over, tells me I’m the worst drive ever. I turn to the girl next to me, and I had no idea who she was and had never talked to her before. 140. 14. At first I just told my best friend, but then the whole school found out. Ow, my shit! This was when Coca Cola started to put people’s names on their bottles. my tiny body dragged the bottle on the floor all the way to the bathroom. my hypothesis? Subscribe and Help Me Hit 4,000,000 little cuties! Each class sees me now working the cash register so that I had woken the... Idiot that I ’ ll just go out for recess now eye for the weekend some wedges but no for. Someone else ’ s wrestling coach also taught geometry, and how excited were! January 19, 2017, 10:55 am or five I was having his hair styled at the hairdresser when! The high school ’ s money at school as a freshman the teachers turned around and saw me with another... A dermatologist about your answers as soon as possible the main source room away from the bowl to the next... 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